I’m determined to maintain hope that any and all bipolar “symptoms” I’ve experienced over the last several years will disappear slowly over time (I’m looking to you, Anatomy of an Epidemic readers!) … but right now I’m annoyed.
Out of nowhere, over the last several days I’ve been waking up early pounding with adrenaline (or cortisol? I really don’t know), pretty anxious, excited, ready to go … and I’ve had some days of feeling hypomanic … the goofy, the energy, the laughing, the rhyming, the jumping up and down at work…. but I am utterly exhausted now. But still waking up with a pounding heart and energy in my feet.
It is unlike me to have physical symptoms of anxiety while not having any mental symptoms. I’m not feeling anxious about anything coming up, really…. but my body doesn’t get that hint, it seems.
More on this later, I hope, but right now I’m just trying to figure out what the heck is going on inside my body and brain.
I did not anticipate having this mini-episode over the past week and I believe I can identify reasons for it- reasons beyond “Oh you’re bipolar, this just happens in the spring.” That is not reason enough for me.