It’s okay

It’s okay to feel exactly how you feel exactly when you feel it. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed even when “nothing major” is going on. It’s okay to let other people feel how they feel and let yourself feel how you feel.

There is no better or worse, or any particular qualifying event for anything– be it anxiety, panic, fear, worry. And it’s okay to not know why. You can say, “I feel overwhelmed,” and not track down the solution. You can say, “I’m feeling so weird inside and I don’t know what’s going on,” and you can certainly say, “I don’t know what I’m feeling right now.” You can say any of these things and it’s okay.

You don’t have to justify or explain why, or narrate a whole series of events that allow you to feel the way you feel. There is no allowing. You can feel however you feel. Period. End of sentence. You are of course welcome to share anything about your day that may have contributed to your emotions. You are of course welcome to tell me why you think you’re feeling the way you are. But here’s the thing- you are not obligated to. Your feelings are just as valid because they are feelings and they are your own. You don’t need to explain or justify yourself to me. Come as you are. As you are is exactly who you are supposed to be.

It’s okay to feel overwhelmed because it’s the end of a long week and you lost your lunch and forgot your water bottle and the train was hot and packed and your blood sugar got too low because you lost your lunch and then you had to buy a sandwich and you’re stressed about money and you’re exhausted and your socks are itchy. That sounds overwhelming. It’s not the same overwhelm as your friend whose cousin is dying, or your friend who may have an STD. If in your head, whatever caused your feelings isn’t “enough” or other people “have it worse,” notice those thoughts. And know that those are old tapes playing because that’s the habit. And that’s okay, too. Know you have a new tape, telling you it’s okay to feel exactly how you feel. We all have emotions. The situation happened. You never have to defend yourself or rationalize it.

It’s okay to feel exactly how you feel.

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